If you are trying to be Superman, have you ever stopped to wonder why?
I have had many sessions with clients (mainly men) on a concept for which they struggle to overcome. That is, trying (and usually failing) to be Superman in our everyday lives. I believe at some point in our lives, we want to be a hero or at least experience something which identifies us as heroic. We dare to dream of taking the heroes’ journey in one sense or another from the time we can imagine and wonder. We yearn for that adventure or moment when we complete a rite of passage and become a hero in someone’s eyes. Our popular culture is saturated with hero myths whether from ancient/modern literature or visual arts. Every society, every age, has at its core hero mythologies that are embedded within the fabric of their civilization. In our time, in our age, Superman has become that iconic symbol for what stands for the ideal hero.
Superman is an entirely different construct compared to most hero myths/journeys. Superman is a god-like idealized, aspirational concept that we strive to become. However, Superman is beyond the hero’s journey in large part because his powers are near infinite in measure. In addition, there is a sometimes-forgotten fact that he is not human which again reinforces the notion that he is beyond the human hero construct. Superman does not really have to struggle with finding himself; rather, his struggle is to understand humanity. He must struggle with not becoming apathetic to the human condition because he is beyond the human condition. In other words, Superman’s quest is trying to be more human. The irony then denotes that while we try to be Superman, he tries to be more like us: fallible, fragile, overwhelmed, confused, yet hopeful, strong, courageous, and determined.
What we do not like to ponder is that even Superman has Kryptonite. For our purposes, it would make sense to consider that if Superman has a weakness, then we must weaknesses abound. The challenge is to admit our fragility, gain insight into our weaknesses, and produce a plan of attack. Our greatest weakness is the hubris it takes to believe we can be Superman. We pile on too much. We focus on making a difference on large scales instead of realizing we are making such a difference in our own little worlds. We try to take on every responsibility, every task, or fix every problem. We usually try taking on the world all alone, isolated, and without help. Hell, even Superman had the Justice League to help shoulder the responsibilities of saving the world. If Superman can defer some responsibility, we are allowed too as well.
I believe the notion of becoming Superman-like puts us out of rhythm. I think as a society, particularly our Western society, we have no sense of balance or rhythm. We vacillate from one spectrum to another. We are either trying to live up to the Superman ideal or failing so miserably that we wind up in the gutters of Gotham City. The latter can be expected when we inevitably fail at trying to become Superman. We suffer and struggle to cope with our inability to become Supermen. We find things to numb ourselves or escape from the pressures of more human-like responsibilities such as being a good citizen, spouse, parent, friend, or human.
6 Steps to Build Self-Worth Beyond Achievement
Self-worth is your intrinsic value as a human being, independent of achievements, abilities, or external validation. It’s the deep sense that you deserve love, respect, and care simply for being you. Self-esteem is related to confidence in your abilities and accomplishments. It is largely dependent on you competencies and achievements. You may feel proud after a presentation, but discouraged after a failure. Your self-esteem goes up and down. Building self-worth often involves addressing internalized messages, childhood experiences, and negative beliefs about yourself. It’s foundational—if self-worth is low, self-esteem is harder to sustain.
Many high-performing professionals tie their value to achievements. But true self-worth comes from internal confidence, not external validation. Here’s how to cultivate lasting self-worth:
- Recognize Your Patterns – Notice when self-doubt or overthinking takes over.
- Identify Your Personal Values – Explore how you want to evaluate and measure your worth/character
- Separate Worth from Achievements – Celebrate progress without attaching it to success metrics.
- Practice Self-Compassion – Speak to yourself with kindness, like you would a friend.
- Set Boundaries – Protect your time and energy to reinforce self-respect.
- Seek Support – A therapist or self-worth coach can guide you toward sustainable change.
Investing in self-worth isn’t indulgent—it’s essential for mental health, relationships, and professional success. Many high performers benefit from working with a self-worth coach to build confidence beyond achievements.
Schedule a session today to start building your internal confidence.
How Overthinking Sabotages Your Success
How Overthinking Sabotages Your Success (and What to Do About It)
Overthinking can feel like mental multitasking—but it often blocks clarity and progress. Common signs include:
- Difficulty making decisions
- Replaying conversations or scenarios in your head
- Chronic worry and anxiety
Why it happens: Overthinking often comes from anxiety, perfectionism, low self-worth, or unresolved trauma.
Practical Steps:
- Pause & Observe – Notice when thoughts spiral instead of suppressing them.
- Challenge the Narrative – Ask: “Is this thought true or helpful?” Ask: “Are others really thinking about our last conversation; am I really in a spotlight?”
- Focus on Action – Shift from rumination to small, achievable steps, or reinforce past successes.
- Therapy Support – Work with a therapist to uncover root causes and build strategies.
Managing overthinking doesn’t happen overnight—but with guidance, it’s possible to regain clarity, confidence, and peace of mind.
Book an online session today to learn practical strategies to manage overthinking.
